10 Best Real Housewives Moments

What was life like before we had the Real Housewives of Somewhere Better Than Your Town to come home to at night? I for one can’t remember a time in my life where I have been happier or more entertained then these past seven years. Yes, it was seven years ago when I discovered the first season of The Real Housewives of Orange County on Netflix and since that day, can’t remember the last time I didn’t spend at least two nights a week with these nut cases on my TV screen. With the exception of a few episodes of Miami and New York, I’ve watched every season religiously and with the newest season of OC starting last week, what better time to share my top 10 Real Housewives moments? That was rhetorical obviously, so here they are (in no particular order because each holds a special place in my heart.) #neverforget

heather-dubrow

Heather going off on Gretchen’s annoying friend, with a name I won’t even bother Googling, at the end of her first season on the show. Heather acted like a perfect princess the entire first season, up until this episode that is. This is the exact moment I fell head over heels in love with Heather. I say this line in my head at least 10x every single day, so it really bonded us for life, I think. I mean, what would YOU say to a belligerent girl, whom you didn’t know, that stuck her fingers in your anniversary cake? #neverforget

scaryislandRHONY trip to Scary Island. This entire episode had my jaw on the ground it was so out of control. It is one of those moments in my life that I can remember perfectly, because it was that life changing and mind boggling. It was like a train wreck I couldn’t look away from every time Kelly opened her mouth. “Hi I’m Kelly I don’t eat processed foods” while she is eating a bag of jelly beans. But by the end I was just sad for her because obviously she was really having some sort of breakdown. #neverforget

whogoncheckmeboo

Oh, Sheree and the party planner. Watching this episode back, I’m not sure why this scene shocked me so badly, because she was already really pissed with this guy going into the meeting. But maybe small town, sheltered, young me couldn’t believe a “professional” person was talking to a client like this. I mean, I’m sure he wasn’t the first person to tell her she needed a reality check, because she did does, I’m sure. #neverforget

prostitutionwhore

Teresa yelling at Danielle and flipping the table. I doubt there is much to say about this moment in time that hasn’t already been said, but I imagine that this is how Teresa would truly act all the time if she didn’t have a camera in her face and a career where she needed at least a few people to like her. She’s clammed down a lot since that first season, and moved on to stirring up trouble off camera where it can’t be proven it looks like to me, but you can still see glimmers of the old Tre here and there. This will go down in reality TV history books, no doubt. #neverforget

gretchen

Tamera getting Gretchen naked wasted. I can still hear her saying “Tameraaaaa” in my mind. No matter how many tequila shots she forced down Gretchen’s throat the laugh was actually on Tamera end the end when Gretchen made out with her twenty year old son. In Tamera’s bathroom. While Gretchen’s boyfriend laid dying in the hospital. #neverforget

joeandjoe

Joe and Joe fighting at the christening. Who’s christening it actually was, I can’t be sure. This GIF is obviously NOT from the christening, but from the counseling retreat they went on to mend their broken family, duh, but you get the general idea. I literally can not think of a worse function to get into a physical altercation than a baptism celebration but maybe that’s just my family’s snobbyness coming out. #neverforget

michaele-salahi

Tareq and Michaele Salahi crashing a state dinner at the White House. Another jaw dropper. What is the state of our national security if these two bozos can get THAT close to the President without even being on some sort of approved list? In. Sane. #neverforget

vickivsgretchen

Vicki and Gretchen getting into it over Slade at an 80s party. Ok, ok I know I said I wouldn’t play favorites, but this might be my favorite one. This could be for the sole reason of that face up there. Hashtag classic. I felt a little bad for Vicki when Slade said she looked like Miss Piggy, but I wholeheartedly agreed with every single thing Gretchen said during this argument. Vicki has been saying terrible things about Slade for years and her BF is just has much of a deadbeat, if not more. #neverforget

bethenny

Bethanny peeing in a bucket right before walking down the aisle. Yep, that is her assistant on her left and her wedding planner on her right and yes she is “shhh”ing them so she can relax. Doing stuff like this is one reason Bethanny will forever and always be one of my favorite humans. She is so unashamed about who she is and what she does. #neverforget

ramona

Romona’s bug eyes on the runway. Insert crying because you are laughing so hard emoji here. THAT FACE. For real though, what was she trying to accomplish here? #neverforget

 

Those are my top 10! Which are your favorites? Am I forgetting any?

It’s Wrong To Brag, But…

It’s Friday people and it’s been another good week. I realize that every day/week/month is not going to be good, but let’s be honest here, life is so much more enjoyable when things are going in your favor. I only feel slightly guilty about bragging about that here, because A) I have worked my butt off to get to this point in my life, making a lot of sacrifices to be where I am and B) I have had my fair share of hard times and I am not so naive to think there aren’t hard times in my future. Rejoice in what you can while you can, I say.

Here are some things contributing to my happiness this week:

1. This wallpaper download from Cocorrina. Swoon. I have already downloaded it to my computer, iPad and iPhone… Obsessed might be an understatement.

hello_spring_white_no_text_by_cocorie-d7ce1kf

2. I got to spend lots of time outside with these two cuties before it turned to winter…again. In this picture baby boy is holding up his “meatballs” also know as those brown balls that fall from gum trees which we told him were called “gumballs.” We got a few good laughs out of that.
treynathan

 

3. This outfit from What Courtney Wore. I’ve only recently discovered Courtney’s blog (???) Must find floral jeans that do not cost $200, like today. Or tomorrow. I think this needs to be what I wear on Easter.
whatcourtneyworefloral

 

4. I was accepted into my first blogging network! So happy for this opportunity to connect with people in my part of the country.
Midwest Style Bloggers

5. My bestie was taken off of bed rest, which means we can finally go see Divergent! We are going to eat our weight in Mexican food then drag our significant others to the theater tonight. Let’s just say, I’m not going to stare at Shailene Woodley…divergent-movie-posterdivergent-official-movie-poster-funstoc-vzehiz70

Have a great weekend, everyone!

“Is This Going To Be a Vlog?”

toadorn2

I told my fiance that I was going to ask him a few questions for the blog and I wanted him to mute the TV so I could have his undivided attention. His response was “Is this going to take long? Is this going to be a vlog?” (We had a whole discussion about vloggers the other day when he saw a commercial with a popular one on TV.) So here you go. A look into the mind of Mr. (almost) Rachel Emily. Thanks for the question inspiration Maeg!

What do I typically write about on the blog?
I mean, everything. Fashion mainly I would say. What happens in your everyday life. Food. Me once every blue moon. Don’t put that in there I’m joking. (No he’s not. He’s so happy to have another post dedicated to him.)

What is the weirdest thing I do because of the blog?
Constantly Snapchat your blog friends (Oh hey Meg & Eunice. Add me friends…rachelemily_49.)

What is a popular women’s fashion item right now?
The color blue. Metallic and embellishments…I only know that because of *my employer. (He works in retail, lol) According to you…furry vests. (The man hates my furry vest which makes me love it even more)

Where is the best place to shop according to women?
Target.

What do I use Pinterest for?
Food, fashion and home décor. Wedding stuff.

 What beauty product could I not live without?
Oh man oh man oh man. Liquid eyeliner. Shampoo? Hairspray? (I’m dying laughing at this point) What? You wrote a whole blog post about liquid eyeliner! (Not quite true but almost)

What is our favorite thing to do together?
Is there a right or wrong answer to this? Go to Los Bravos? Go for walks in the park? Go anywhere with food, really. Watch TV and snuggle. Except when I move around when you are laying on me. You hate that. (And there’s his spastic nature coming right on out!)

What does my perfect day look like?
Sun bright as can be, about 200 degrees outside, you are at the beach with a margarita in your hand. And a book. (Fist bump. Nailed it!)

What’s the Pantone color of the year for 2014?
Is that a brand? According to *my employer the color of the year is blue. 

What do I keep in my purse?
Wallet, lip stuff, a mirror (X), your phone if it’s not in your pocket. Sunglasses. Kleenex.

What do I do when I’m home alone?
Blog. And watch Criminal Minds. (Ding ding ding, we have a winner)

What do you do when you are home alone?
Watch baseball. Play fantasy sports. (Real deep, this guy)

What is my favorite accessory?
Your engagement ring (duh) and earrings in general.

What is your favorite non physical trait about me?
Your honesty.

What is my favorite TV show?
Scandal. (Winner winner chicken dinner)

What is my favorite cocktail?
Margarita. Limaritas if we are going to be specific.

Anything else you want to say to the blog world?
Be nice to each other and quit hogging my baby girl. (<3)

toadorn1Shirt c/o ToAdorn
(use code “ilovetoadorn” for 10% off any order)
Vest from Bloggers Closet
Necklace from Nordstrom Rack
Jeans from Gap (best jeans ever)
Boots from Old Navy

Outdoor Living Spaces + A New Blog Design

Oh yes I did! I’ve joined the big WordPress leagues and have become a self hosted site. I’m really not ready to talk about how awful of an experience that is/was but I do have this pretty new blog design to show for it. Big thanks to Meg from Yammering Yankee for that. Super pretty to look at but I feel like I am back at square one (aka zero knowledge) when it comes to my posts and sidebar, so bare with me as I get my ish together.

This weekend was pretty great. Awesome weather, lots of time with my favorite three year old, a ton of good food (oink oink) and a whole afternoon of house hunting with the fiance. Between the beautiful weather and the house hunting, I’m having patio fever something serious. My fiance and I are both obsessed with the idea of the patio/deck and yard in our future home. We have already looked at a few homes with terrible backyards and said “Next!”

So being a twenty-something female, I came right home last night and started scrolling through Houzz and Pinterest for patio inspiration. I found the picture below, absolutely swooned, and knew I wanted to recreate for our future home.

I love the blonde, teak wood, the colorful pillows and the lanterns of course! I seriously could stare at this picture all day and yearn for an outdoor space that is more than 5×5 feet with a chair to sit in. #condolyfe
So being this twenty-something female with a blog, I thought, “well that’s a blog post right there” and took my little fingers right on over to Google to find the pieces I will need to recreate this beautiful patio. Here’s what I found:

PicMonkey Collage4-13-14Target: Pillows // Table // Chair // Lantern
Pottery Barn: Console Serving Table
Meijer: Outdoor Area Rug
One Kings Lane: Fire Bowl

Not pictured: Lots of hanging, twinkley lights, more lanterns, and candles…candles everywhere. I’m obsessed with romantic lighting. (Expect all that and more at the wedding, folks.)

This just brings me so much happy. I LOVE pattern mixing and what better place to do it than in the back yard? My fiance saw that those chairs were $300 a pop (from Target, sheesh!) and about died. I have a feeling he is in for many more real world sticker shock moments over the next few months. :)

Whata Week

Hellooooo Friday! Nice to see ya. It’s been a great week but the weekend is looking pretty great from where I’m sitting so let’s just do this thing and call it quits, ok?

I haven’t shared many pictures lately so here are some highlights from my week:

1. Meeting this precious baby for the first time while chatting with her mom and dad which doesn’t happen near enough.

babyparker

2. This guy got a new job! Praise the Lord. We are sad to be moving on from the great people he worked for before, but so so so done with working every weekend, all weekend. Plus, he is going to stay on very part time at his old job so we can still get the amazing discount. What a guy. I could not be more proud to be marrying this man!

nathansnewjob2

3. Pretty much all of my extra time for the last seven days has looked like some version of this. But our beautiful save the dates are done, addressed, mailed and have started arriving at everyone’s homes! I actually got a few other wedding related things crossed off the list this week and it feels so good. 162 days to go!

save the dates2

4. The sun shined in Indiana. I repeat THE SUN SHINED IN INDIANA. And it was warm. When it is 77 degrees in a place that hasn’t seen above 10 in months, you plant your butt on a beach towel in the driveway like the hillbilly you might be (I live in a condo and the sun wasn’t shining in our yard, ok?), grab a drink and a book and park it there until the sun sets. There was no where else I would have rather been last night. Except maybe by a pool or on a beach some where but I would like to think that goes without saying.

sunshine

 

5. There isn’t a picture for this one, but we got pre-approved for a home loan and looked at a couple houses! (I told you it was a good week!) When our mortgage broker called me to let me know we had been approved, I literally cried because we have worked so long and hard to be where we are. I am so anxious to start making a home, but I’m nervous too. It’s such a huge commitment and I don’t want to rush into anything because we are overly excited. (Which I totally tend to do).

Have a great weekend, friends. See you Monday when I hopefully have my new blog design ready to show off!

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5 Year Anniversary of The Taylor Swift Experience

…this one is longer than normal guys. But it is a story that needs to be told so I can look back when I’m old and grey and remember some of the best/craziest times of my life.

This one time back in April 2009 this chick name Taylor Swift kicked off her Fearless tour in my home town. She was not that big of a deal yet, but getting there, especially among country music fans like myself. One of my good friends and I were the first of our group of friends to be completely obsessed with her so we knew we absolutely had to go to this concert at any cost. I remember sitting in whatever college math class I was in at the time, trying to buy tickets on Ticketmaster at the exact moment they went on sale. Of course, they sold out within a minute and a half and I was left heartbroken wondering what I had done to deserve such treatment from Taylor.

So next we did what any reasonable almost 21 year old’s would do, we went to Craig’s List! Craig’s List has everything, duh, so we purchased two tickets from a nice man with some sort of Asian name for about $150 on Craig’s List. Yeeeah!! He is going to email us the tickets after the Western Union transfer goes though! (Can anyone see where this is going yet?) We’re going to see Taylor, we’re going to see Taylor!

Except the tickets ended up being a scam…wah wah waaaah. Talk about the most upsetting thing ever. Thank God (no really, thank you God) I was having some sort of trouble with my bank account right before this happened and the money didn’t end up getting transferred out before we realized it was a scam. Again I say, thank you God.

But we didn’t give up hope. We took ourselves right on over to Stub Hub and purchased another set of $150 tickets that came via email right after completing our purchase through Pay Pal. We were excited, but honestly still a little skeptical about if the tickets would work when when actually got there. It was 2009 after all and we had already been scammed once.

Concert day came and we decided to go to a “Pre Taylor Swift Party” one of the local country radio stations was having at the mall. We each signed up to win the grand prize, two second row floor tickets to the show and a meet and greet with Taylor herself. We knew we were never going to win and were happy to be going to the concert at all, but felt we had to at least try to meet the girl of our dreams.

Guess who’s name they called as the winner? Yep, ya girl.

taylorswift1Winner winner chicken dinner.

taylorswift2Dying, obviously.

taylorswift3I’m literally saying at this point, “Don’t put that microphone in my face unless you want these children to hear curse words.”

taylorswift4To say we were excited would be the understatement of the century.

Being the amazing friend’s that we were, we GAVE OUR FIRST SET OF TICKETS AWAY to two of our best friends that didn’t want to come with us in the first place…and then my friend’s mom basically told us we were idiots, which we were.

After buying some $25 copies of Taylor’s Rolling Stone’s cover and waiting in line for what seemed like hours with twenty, twelve year old little girls and their mom’s, I finally got my turn to meet the girl, the myth, the legend…T SWIFT.

taylorswift6

And here is how that (embarrassing) conversation went…

Rachel: “Oh my god! You are so pretty! I love your dress!”
Taylor: “Thank you so much! It’s from Anthropologie. I love your top! And your ring!” (Pity comments, no doubt) “Do you want to take a picture?”
Rachel: “Of course!” (Smile, proceed to take the worst possible picture I have ever seen of myself)
Taylor: “Yay! Can I sign that for you?” (She signs only one copy of my Rolling Stone. I had two, so that caused me to end the night in tears because someone was so mad at me for not asking to get them both signed. What can I say, I’ve always been a rule follower and they said she would only sign one thing.)
Rachel: “Oh my gosh, thank you so much! This is so awesome. You are so sweet. Oh, and I follow you on Twitter(???). (What can I say people. Twitter was a new thing at the time and I thought she would be impressed. She wasn’t.)
Taylor: “Well, it was great to meet you! I hope you enjoy the show.”

taylorswift5Then we sat THAT CLOSE and it was the best concert that I have been to in my 26 years of life. Including the other two Taylor Swift concerts I’ve been to since then. Good thing that pimple popped up on my upper lip in the middle of all of it. It wanted to join in the fun, I guess.

Honestly, it was one of the best nights of my life, hands down. Oh, I forgot to mention…My embarrassing conversation with Taylor during the meet and greet? Documented on the re-release, platinum edition of her Fearless album. You can see me tearing up and FREAKING OUT like the twelve year olds around me. I should be embarrassed probably, but I got to meet Taylor Swift and I would do it all over exactly the same way today if I could. 20 year old tears and all.

Happy (almost) 5 year anniversary, Taylor.

“You can because you must, and you just do.”

A little over a week ago I took my car to my sweet mechanic for her regular check up aka to have my oil changed. It was fairly early because I was trying to get it over with and get to work as quickly as possible. Of course that didn’t work out and 4 hours and $400 later I was picking her back up cursing myself for deciding to change my oil at all. But I digress. Like I said, it was early and they had the Today show playing in the waiting room. I was mainly focusing on reading blogs but perked up when I saw this Kate Winslet interview come on…

(Just watch it. It’s only three minutes. If you don’t have three minutes fast forward to minute two and watch it from there.)

I would have considered myself a Kate Winslet fan before I saw this interview (hello, she IS British). Who doesn’t love Titanic? Or The Holiday? Ok The Reader was weird, but come on TITANTIC. After seeing this interview though, she is my spirit animal me thinks. Not only does she continue to swear on morning television but everything she said about being a mother and just making things work really moved me.

Obviously, I am not a mother. Actually, maybe that’s not so obvious to some of you, but now you know! However, I did put myself through college with a full time and several part time jobs which was stressful and challenging to say the least. I did this for almost seven years have had countless people say to me “I don’t know how you do it!” I never really knew what to say to those people until it hit me while watching this interview. “You can because you must, and you just do.” It is what I had to do to support myself and graduate college with zero debt. I had to do it so I just did. I’m with Kate on this one too, it’s empowering. Now that it is behind me I can truly see what an accomplishment it was.

I don’t say this to toot my own horn, really. I know there will be challenges that come with motherhood and other parts of my life that will make me yearn for the “simplicity” of those seven years when I was really only responsible for myself. I will forget how hard those times were because there will be even harder times, but I will make it though. I know I’ll make it through because I see women here in blog land and in my own life who deal with so much more than me every single day. But we can because we must, so we just do.

Not sure if I’ve talked about this song enough this week…so here you go!

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32 Reasons To Be Happy

Sometimes I am way guilty of focusing on what is not going my way in life, complaining about stupid little things (or big things) and sounding like a big whiney baby. Venting to each other is human nature, that is something that has become obvious to me over the years and for clinical over share-er like me, sometimes I need to be reminded not to be that girl. You know that girl. The one that no one likes to be around because she is always only talking about how unjust her life has been or how stupid her significant other acts.
4-3-14

I’ve always loved that quote.

Hopefully, I’m not so far gone no one wants to be around me, but sometimes I do need to be reminded to count my blessings. Because they are many! I have been in a weird funk the last few days so when Erin and Sarah challenged us to write a post about 32 things that make us happy, I thought I’d better hop on that train. So here we go! 32 things that make me smile.

1. The new blog design coming my way from this girl. I got a sneak peek on Tuesday and I’m excited for what I’ve seen so far!

2. Anna Kendrick is hosting SNL this weekend! Love everything about that funny girl.

3. Holidays. All of them, I’m not picky.

holidays

4. Chrissy Teigen’s tweets. I’ve said it before but if you aren’t following this chick, you are missing out.

5. All the weddings and wedding related events coming up. My cousin is getting married in June, I’m the maid of honor in another wedding in July and my wedding is in September which means there are SO MANY wedding events coming!

6. Divergent. The book not the movie. I’m so close to being done but refuse to see the movie until I do.

7. Summer road trips. Weddings, bachelorette parties, baseball games and OUR HONEYMOON. Ok the honeymoon isn’t really a road trip per say, but you get the idea.

8. Flowers for no reason. Buying them for myself or being gifted with them, doesn’t matter either way but they make my heart soar.

flowers

9. House hunting

10. Building new friendships out here in the blogging community.

11. What You Do To Me by Dan + Shay. I only listened to this song 100x yesterday.

12. The spring storm happening outside my window.

13. Iced vanilla macchiatos from Starbucks. Yum.

14. The last couple productive, busy, successful weeks at work.

15. Our marriage counseling books coming in the mail. It’s getting real people.

16. Wine. Just wine.

17. One of my good friend’s having her baby! I can’t wait to meet little Parker Elizabeth today.

18. Another one of my baby sisters is coming to work for me.

19. What To Expect When You Are Expecting (the movie). I watched this for the first time this week with my pregnant bestie and I have no idea why I waited so long. It’s hilarious. And on Netflix so go check it out.

20. Harry Potter Marathons on ABC Family. But really, anything to do with Harry Potter.

HP

21. Having a savings account with money in it. Hasn’t happened since I started college! Also, having zero debt so that this is possible.

22. My new watch from The Modern Tulip.

23. Our wedding save the dates are here and ready to be put together.

24. This sore butt and legs. It means I kicked booty at the gym this week! I got this #1800minutechallenge.

25. My birthday is just over a month away!

26. Sticking your fingers in a bowl of ice water to instantly dry your nails. A little painful sure, but well worth the hour you save waiting to do anything while they dry.

27. The crockpot. God bless you crockpot for making cooking dinner so easy some nights.

28. The friends and family who love me even when I don’t put as much into my relationships with them as I should.

29. Warmer weather so I can run/exercise outside. I’m not one of those girls you will see running in the snow, but I do prefer outside over the treadmill when it is nice out.

30. Leopard print…anything.

31. Living. Doing things. Having new experiences and making memories.

32. All the blogs. Really, all of you. You all inspire and encourage me on a daily basis. Even the days when you blog/talk about something negative, because then I know I’m not out here alone.

April’s Focus

AprilFocus

One of the main reasons I started this blog was to have a place that challenged me to be intentional with my time. For so many years, seven to be exact, my life revolved around school and work with a little time with my boyfriend, family and friends thrown in. Now that I’m adjusting to life after graduation I want this blog to be somewhere I come to be able to share my journey so I can look back and think “Wow, that was a hard time,” or “That was so much fun when we did that,” or even “I can’t believe I was so ridiculous to say that on the internet.”

Whoever or whatever I am at this point in my life, I’m really trying to be more intentional in setting and reaching goals. So when I saw that one of my faves, Maeg of The Modern Tulip, was hosting a link up where we share our intentions for the coming month, I knew I had to join in. I am a firm believer in putting intentions into words and sharing them with others people to create more accountability for yourself.

I have a few intentions and habits that I plan to continue in the month of April, like only spending money on eating out once a week. I haven’t talked about that one on the blog but it was something my fiance and I decided about 5 weeks ago while we try to save money for our first home. It really was just a bad habit to break and now it hardly ever even crosses my mind to eat out (seriously) so I’m hoping that happens in April, too!

This month I am going to focus on getting into a better work out routine. I religiously attend a boot camp class twice a week at my gym, but that has been about it for last couple of months (with a run thrown in once a week, tops). I have chosen coming home after work to plop down in my bed or staying in bed all morning on the weekends over getting my butt to the gym, and it shows. With our wedding only 170 days away, I have got to get back into it so I feel better about myself if anything. I have become lazy in my free time and that has got to stop.

I am joining Erin from Living in Yellow in her 1800 Minute Challenge for even more accountability this month. It is basically a challenge to be active for 30 minutes a day from April 1 – May 31, keeping a record of them, and being entered to win a grand prize! I need all the help I can get though, so help a sister out by checking in on me this month and make sure I am staying on track.

 

Healthier Chocolate Muffins

It’s kind of funny. I’m not a huge sweets person, except for in the morning. Weird, right? Dessert never really sounds good to me, usually because I’m so full from dinner that I can’t possibly justify eating anything else. I would rather eat another roll or gorge myself on chips and queso before I “save room” for dessert. For some reason, most mornings I need something sweet. Too often this leads me to shove a left over cookie or brownie into my mouth and call it “breakfast” but even more often it means I crave a doughnut or muffin.

featured

Obviously, this is not the healthiest of habits so when I came across this recipe on Pinterest, I was over the moon. A healthier chocolate muffin where one of the main ingredients was something I find myself throwing away on the regular? I’m in. 100% IN. The bananas replace oil and whole wheat flour (you can’t taste it, swear) make these babies a better option than your normal high calorie muffin or doughnut.

chocolatemuffinstuff

So here is what you will need to start your day in pure chocolaty, low calorie heaven:

  • 3 Bananas you would normally throw away. AKA very ripe bananas. (Seriously, the riper the better. The more ripe they are the less they will taste like banana and the more muffin texture-y these will be. It took my fiance a while to get over this part.)
  • 1/2 Cup Unsweetened Cocoa Powder (Oxymoronic, if you ask me but whatevs.)
  • 1 Cup Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips
  • 1/2 to 2/3 Cup Sugar (depending how sweet/unhealthy you want them to be)
  • 1/2 Cup All Purpose Flour
  • 1/2 Cup Whole Wheat Flour
  • 1 Teaspoon Baking Powder
  • 1 Teaspoon Cocaine Baking Soda (Maybe yours won’t be stored in a baggie, though)
  • 1/3 Cup Unsweetened Apple Sauce
  • 1 Egg (not in the picture because I only had two to begin with and the first I tried to photograph rolled off the counter onto the floor)
  • Cupcake Pan and Liners (Le Duh)

Go ahead and pre-heat your oven to 375.
Mix all of your wet ingredients together (banana, applesauce, egg, oh and sugar which isn’t wet but go with it). It will look something like this…

noms

…and you may lose your appetite but hang in there it gets better.

Next you’ll want to mix in the rest of your dry ingredients. She says you should sift them together but ain’t no body got time for that (or…they don’t have a sifter like me). I have found that it works just as well to mix them together before hand then add them in a little at time.

step 3

Man, I bet you are starving after that picture! No? But why? Ps. This was a double batch (oink oink) so you won’t have quite this much batter in your bowl. Unless you make a double batch, too (oinkers unite).

Now I guess you should put your batter into the pan. You should fill the liners to the top and get about 12 muffins. Take a picture of your pans because without even trying they are color coordinated and that makes your OCD heart soar.

ocdlove

Now pop those babies in the oven for about 20 minutes and bam, you have a delicious way to start your day that isn’t a diet ruin-er. Don’t say I never told you anything useful. While these are cooking I suggest going outside to play with your sous-chef…

foxyroxy

Remove and feast. Nom nom nom.

finished muffins