The Only Thing That Feels Right

But on the other hand, nothing feels right tonight.

My second post in and I already have to bring sadness here. But that is the twisted, sick, real world we live in and this blog will not be a place where I ignore that part of the world. Especially on days where it is thrown in my face.

This morning I was tweeting back and forth with my little sister, a student at Purdue University. We were chatting about how we missed each other and couldn’t wait to see each other in a few weeks when she comes home. Not 10 minutes later I get a message from another one of my sisters, who is also a Purdue student, that there was a shooting in the building where my aforementioned sister was attending class. She is completely safe, thank God, but one teaching assistant is not. His family isn’t sitting around tonight thanking God for protecting their loved one, like I am.

Immediately after hearing about the shooting, my heart broke and I began sobbing. I cried for my sister’s safety. I cried because my family and I can’t be there to hug her and just be there for her during this traumatic time. I cried because I doubt Purdue will ever be the place of complete fun and innocence that it has always been for both of my sisters. I cried for the entire University, because so many people’s lives will never be the same. I think I’ve been numb since I stopped crying. I just can’t wrap my head around tragedy like this.

My sister is completely safe. Her entire class and everyone else in the building got out safely. It feels so wrong to thank God that there was “only” one victim. But again, I won’t be anything but real in this space, and I’m so relieved and thankful that God protected my sister today. It feels completely ironic that this happened on National Hug Day, when all I want to do is hug both of my sisters, but I can’t. Please, go hug your sisters for me, if you can.


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