Last week, a sweet reader emailed me and gave me an update on how things were going in her life. She had a baby a few months ago and recently started taking her son to work with her just like I do with Camden. She shared a few struggles and a funny story about how awkward things can get when you tell a man you need to pump (#truth) but my favorite line in the whole email was this one:
“I am so glad I came across your blog–it helped me to realize that I could work with my baby at my side! It’s not always easy but it is so worth it to be with him on more than just weekends! Hats off to you and thanks for the inspiration!“
And guys, I cried.
Not because I was so moved that our story inspired her to think she may be able to work and raise her son at the same time (though that part is awesome) but because it encouraged me in two of the biggest ways I have been struggling lately.
The first was just blogging in general. Yes, of course I’m busier now that I have a baby but even more so I have been struggling with constant thoughts like “Why am I even doing this?” “Everything I have to say, someone else has already said/is saying better than me.” “Who wants to read about our boring life?” This sweet email proved to me that those thoughts are lies. Our story is totally unique. Which seems funny to think about because I know almost exactly the number of people in my life that can relate to taking their baby to work with them outside of the home and in the last week that number has risen to two so you would have thought that would have been obvious. But it wasn’t. At least not to me.
The second thing was probably one of the biggest lessons I have been learning as a mother lately, and that is how much I need grace and how much grace I need. I’m just going to lay it all out there – this woman had no reason to A) send me this email or B) be so nice to me in it. She emailed me a few months ago telling me she was going to start taking her baby to work and asking if I had any advice for her. I emailed her back and basically said “Yes! Let me get back to you!” then never did. I thought about it a lot and even took some notes in my phone but just kept pushing it off. What a jerk. Before I was a mom I took pride in being super organized, dependable, and a person who rarely forgot to do things. Now most days, I feel like I am holding on to everything by the shortest, thinnest thread possible and most of the time I have crazy anxiety that I’ve forgotten to do something that I said I was going to do (<— THE WORST). But that’s what grace is. It covers and comforts us when we do everything we can to deserve the opposite. This sweet woman had ZERO reason to think I cared to hear an update on her life (even though I really did!) because all of my actions pointed in the other direction. Thank you sweet Christa for giving me the grace I need in this season! (And thank you to the friends, family, co-workers and probably dozens more people who give me grace on the regular.)
Go out and give grace today, friends. We all need it desperately. But also, ACCEPT IT for yourself. It’s there. Just take it.